Jim Heffernan Chronicle: Underwater Hotel in Two Harbors Storylines E! News UK
There are discussions at Two Harbors about the possibility of building an underwater hotel with an associated submarine. How exciting is that?
But first, thanks to the internet, this column is occasionally read in other parts of the country, or even the world, where some readers might not be familiar with scenic Two Harbors. By way of explanation, this is a small hamlet of boating, brewing, car sales and tourism – whether or not to build an underwater hotel, that is the question – along the north shore of the Lake Superior, a jump, jump and jump to the east of Duluth (seems to be north, though).
As one might deduce, there are two ports in Two Harbors, but they call them “bays”. There is Agate Bay and Burlington Bay. Most maritime operations are in Agate Bay, where the huge ore wharf is, so the submarine hotel would go to Burlington Bay, they say.
Who says? Well, the mayor and a mysterious billionaire who goes by the name “MO” Oh my God. We can only hope his last name isn’t “omicron”.
Still, it’s certainly an intriguing development, even if some Hamlet leaders are a bit skeptical. You can’t blame them. For one thing, how deep is Burlington Bay? This would determine how many floors the underwater hotel could have. Maybe they should build a one-story underwater motel with a mooring outside the rooms. I do not know.
Years ago, I was traveling in Greece, in the “mountains” (the Alps are not) outside of Athens, and stayed in a hotel built into the side of a mountain. You entered the lobby at street level, checked in, then took a multi-story elevator to your room. Very exciting and I slept like a log.
I guess that’s kind of how the Two Harbors Underwater Hotel (THUH) should work, if the rooms were to be in the depths of Burlington Bay. There is also mention of a submarine that was somehow involved in transporting tourists. Fun. Hire Captain Nemo.
For interest (I certainly hope), here is some esoteric information about submarines on the local front: there was talk of a submarine in Lake Superior during WWII. In an early conspiracy theory, these evil Nazis from Germany were there to stop America’s valuable shipment of iron ore from Minnesota for the war effort, some of which passed through Two Harbors itself, as well as Duluth and Superior, of course.
The theory postulated that the Germans were smuggling U-boat parts overland across Canada to a remote area along Lake Superior and assembling an U-boat that would sneak up to the head of the lakes and would torpedo our ore carriers. It never happened, of course, but it would make a good movie.
I guess the novelty of spending a night in an underwater hotel would appeal to many tourists. Far be it from me to throw a wet blanket over the idea of an underwater hotel, but they should definitely watch out for leaks. (I’m not sure the term “wet blanket” is appropriate here. Sorry.)
Bathrooms were once called “water-closets” in good company. This development could bring them back. In an underwater hotel, all the closets are water closets, in a way.
Hotel room windows, of course, would overlook Burlington Bay underwater. What might visitors see? Well, big fish, I guess. Coho salmon and others swimming around anxious for their next meal, perhaps an occasional creature from the Black Lagoon or a wandering mermaid? Exciting.
I wish the developers good luck despite all this advice on this. But we shouldn’t hold our breath waiting for this to become a reality. (I’m not sure “holding our breath” is appropriate for ruminating on an underwater hotel, either.)
For the record, there are no black lagoon creatures or mermaids in Lake Superior the last time I checked.
The only floating – yes, floating – cost figure so far is $400 million. Would it be one night to stay there and include a submarine ride? Inquiring minds want to know.
Jim Heffernan is a former Duluth News Tribune news and opinion writer and columnist. He blogs about
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